First Blood - Part 4

Next I changed into my wetsuit, laid out the diving gear and the dive scooter and packed up my street clothes and empty duffel bags. Everything was going into the water, even the bike which I would ditch. I figured I would ditch about 4 grand worth of gear on this run. My main target tonight probably made that much money in just 4 minutes. Now I'm not poor but I wasn't going to be able to drop this kind of money every time. Remember, I'm a cheap bastard. Maybe I could submit a paper to the Harvard Business Review on the cost/benefit of various assassination techniques.

Anyway, I grabbed my rifle and ammo, went up to my firing position and started scanning the scene. More people had arrived and the party was in full swing. About 2/3rds were in costume and about half had covered or painted faces. I tried to read the body language of people to find out which one was my main target. It stands to reason that the host or hostess of a party will more and behave differently than a party guest. After awhile I was pretty sure he was dressed as a Southern Colonel in a white linen suit. I had memorized the faces of 23 top level people in this firm but so far I was able to id only the Colonel and 3 others.

When I was walking back from setting up the fireworks diversion, I had decided that I would not shoot to kill at anyone I couldn't identify. I had a hunch that 2 of the execs were dressed as the half white/half black guys from the original Star Trek. I was sort of tempted to give em a pass for that but the more I watched them, the more confident I became they were on the list of 23. So now I had 6 targets.

I needed to pick out some more targets but couldn't recognize any others from the list of 23. So I decided I'd target some of the more obnoxious costumes. Top of the list was a guy dressed as a bundle of cash. That should get some good press - "Bank exec dressed as wad of money, shot in the ass at Halloween party!"

There were a fair number of ladies dressed in some pretty racy outfits. The harem girls and the stunning I Dream of Jeanie look alike were definitely safe along with the cutie dressed as a wood nymph.

Now the guy in the flesh colored body suit and wearing a wooden barrel, he was going to get bunged along with the dastardly robber baron, the Southern plantation owner, and the Great Gatsby. There was a guy in a fat cat suit but I wasn't sure if he was just a furry or plushie, a cartoon cat or actually a fat cat. The last batch was a bling pimp, a walking money tree, and a walking classic fountain pen.

Well that was that and so I started dialing the fireworks phone...

First Blood - Part 3

So why would face painted or mask wearing guests be a problem? It's not because of some sacred clown consideration. No, it would just make target id more difficult. I figure I would spend 60 seconds shooting up to 20 rounds but probably more like just 12-15 and I wanted to get as many high ranking guests as possible. I didn't want to waste ammo on lower level people or even worse if some actors had been hired to liven up the event.

I mulled over how I would handle this as I walked back down to the SCUBA gear and set everything up. Then I went over to the gun bag and pulled out what I called my "science fair project." It was 4 Roman candles and a long string of firecrackers fused together with a cell phone igniter. The idea was if I set it off just before I started shooting, the party guests would all stop what they were doing, turn to look at the Roman candles and stand still. So they'd present a more uniform targeting situation for me.

Also the report of the Roman candles and especially the firecrackers would help mask the sound from my bullets. I was pretty happy with my homemade suppressor but I wasn't using sub-sonic ammunition and no matter how great your silencer is at muzzle blast reduction, it won't silence the acoustic signature of a supersonic bullet. I was also banking on the fireworks starting a fire. When I recon'd the area, one of the spots I considered was just 200 yards away from the estate, but I thought it was a bit too close.

I turned on the 2nd phone that I would use to call the igniter phone and checked signal strength. It was low but should be adequate so I walked back down the road, hustled toward the estate, crossed the road and then up into the brush. About 40 feet away and slightly downhill from the spot I'd have used if I really shot from here, I unrolled the bundle, gently pushed the roman candle sticks into the soft loamy soil, then laid down the phone, uncoiled more fuse and then the string of firecrackers. When I called the phone, the current going to the phone ringer would trigger an igniter that would light the fuses. The shorter fuse led to the rockets and the longer fuse would give me some delay before setting off the firecrackers. I piled a bunch of dried leaves and pine needles underneath the rockets and over the firecrackers.

So why did I want a fire to start at this spot? Well it would definitely draw the authorities to this spot they would assume this was where the shooting came from and that I started the fire to destroy any trace DNA. This would also reduce the odds that they'd look at my real shooting location and find any trace DNA there. And since this spot was inland from the road and further away from the water, it would also reduce the possibility that they would think I escaped via the water. I also tossed 8 AK-47 shell casings where I figured they'd land if I had been using that kind of gun. They came from a stash of brass I picked up at an outdoor range months ago. They were left by someone else and I wiped em for prints. Again, if the police picked these up, maybe they'd think I used a different type of gun. I'm not an expert on the finer points of ammunition but the AK and my ammo are both 7.62mm diameter. I guess if the gun forensics people were good, they'd know something was amiss but hey, maybe I'd get lucky and they'd just go with an AK as the gun. Yeah, I'm a sly, sneaky bastard. I sure hope these diversionary steps don't bite me in the ass.

Now, if you're a really detail-oriented person, you'll be wondering what if the cops trace the cellphones? Well both the trigger phone and the phone I would be using to call were throw away phones I bought with cash at 2 separate stores. Then I activated them from an open WiFi network from a netbook with a spoofed MAC address. This particular cellular service gives you 30 free message units if you activate online so I didn't have to buy any airtime cards. Each phone was like 10 bucks. Yeah, I'm a cheap bastard too. I turned on the igniter phone and headed back to the real shooting position.

First Blood - Part 2

(recounting the events of early Saturday, Oct. 31 aka Halloween morn...)

I'd be lying if I said I slept like a baby. It took me a while to finally get to sleep wondering how things would go and mulling over contingencies. When I got up, I treated myself to some scratch waffles along with eggs, bacon and some coffee with melted chocolate and cream. Hey, this could be my last breakfast as a free man or a live one.

I quickly loaded up the rental car and began the 2 hour drive down. I swung by the target estate, drove past and then pulled over and parked near my special spot. I walked up to the shooting point and checked what was going on at the estate. The tent, space heaters, tables, chairs were all set up and the catering crew was setting up the BBQ grills. My firing lines looked good and my surroundings seemed undisturbed. Next I drove past the trailhead parking lot - there were a fair number of parking spaces open - looking good. I cruised by where I'd drop off my hiking pack, also looking the same, and then went to the next town over for some lunch.

I pigged out. Partly out of Last Supper paranoia and more pragmatically that I'd need the calories for a long, wet, cold night in the water. I started with a drive thru jumbo cheeseburger, fries and cheese-filled Jalapeno peppers. Then I got some fried fish and a thick chocolate malt. I'd feed one more time before going on station. For that, I popped into a grocery store and picked up some fruit, cheese, crackers and cookies then grabbed a short, digestive nap.

Fed and rested, I stashed my hiking pack then dropped off and stashed the scuba gear and then the gun and sniping gear in a separate spot. I snacked on the drive to the trailhead parking lot, unloaded the bike and pedaled back toward the hit site. About a half mile away, I did what bears do in the woods. I don't mind taking a leak in a wet suit (ahhh warmth) but steaming hot or not I'd rather not drop a deuce and then smush & wallow in it for hours.

It was fairly dark when I arrived at about 6:30. I dropped the bike near the scuba gear, checked the tank pressures, and then went up and checked the estate. It was nicely lit up and a fair number of the fashionably on time were enjoying cocktails, appetizers and conversation.

I also hit my first complication - many of the guests were in costume and wearing masks or face paint. Gah! It's a Halloween costume party. That's what I get for assuming they'd be a pack of boring stiffs...

DC Sniper Executed

Well they pulled the plug on John Allen Muhammad last night. He was the elder of the DC sniper pair that randomly killed 10 innocent people back in 2002. What he did prompted some thinking on my part, mostly centering on "am I like him?"

I'd say I am not like him. I am not just killing at random. I'm selecting my targets and I take care not to hit or hurt others. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. But I don't expect it to carry any weight in a court of law.

I wonder how the court of public/popular opinion will judge me...

Achoooo!

I made it out and back okay. I consider it a success but with a twist. I did manage to catch one hell of a cold. Details to follow soon.